did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize