so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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