I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
