no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
