Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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