the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
