; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
