Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
