i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
