i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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