Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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