Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
