I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize