I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize