I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
