Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
