she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Holy sore nipples Batman
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
