Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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