Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
