fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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