i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
