Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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