how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
