Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
