Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
