maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
