Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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