i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
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