Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
