What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
