I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
