Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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