Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
