I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
What happened to fro yo and sex?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
