a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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