Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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