My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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