i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
