My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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