the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
