Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
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