Don't you send me to vm
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Randomize
