So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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