well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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