We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize