at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Randomize
