Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
