More tranny stories later!
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize