So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
he thought i was a dude.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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