I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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