btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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