I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
